Cat Sitting
by Jet Dreamer
Summary: Due to work, Kazuma ask Hatori to watch a 6-year-old Kyo. The easily annoyed dragon must put up with a very shy cat for an entire weekend. I wonder who will get on who's nerves worse? Please review.
1. Chapter 1

Cat Sitting

Kyo: The following is a non-profit fan-based parody. 'Fruits Basket is owned by 'Funimation', 'TV Tokyo', 'Tokyo Pop', and Natsuki Takaya. Please support the official release.

(Third Person)

Hatori was not looking forward to this Saturday on an extreme level. He didn't want to do it, but there wasn't much of an option. Or, he was the only option.

The doorbell rang and he went to answer it.

"I can't believe this." Hatori murmured to himself. He wasn't the best person with kids. They were loud and disobedient. They have to be told what to do. To him, hell is being surrounded in a dare care.

So you can imagine the look on the dragon's face when he was presented with a 6 year old Kyo Sohma!

"I really appreciate this." Kazuma stated.

"You really couldn't find anyone else?" he asked. Looking down, he saw the shy little cat clinging to his guardian. 'Great' he thought, 'I've got an apron baby'.

"Well, he is the cat after all. You're the only one of us who doesn't look at someone and judge automatically." Kazuma meant well, but he was wrong to a degree.

"Fine. Come in Kyo."

Defiant in fear, Kyo stood there with Kazuma. He didn't remove his shoes or his jacket. He just remained a statue glued to his father figure. A scared cat.

"Kyo, it's time to go with cousin Hatori." Kazuma stated. Kyo shook his head.

Still not moving, "He's scary."

"Kyo!" Kazuma said sternly, "Go inside with cousin Hatori. I'll be back tonight to pick you up after my tournament. You won't be any trouble, will you?"

"No."

Scuffing his hair, "Good." With that, Kazuma left.

"If you don't come inside, I'm gonna close the door and lock you out in the snow."

Not taking any chance, Kyo ran inside.

Groaning, "This is gonna be a long day!"

!

After three hours, Hatori decided it was time to take a break from notes. He entered the kitchen to see what he could scrimmage for a snack. As was Kyo!

The six year old stood on the counter reaching for a pop tart in the cabinet. No parent experience is required in order to grab the child and put them on equal ground.

"Kyo! What were you doing?" Hatori interrogated.

"I'm hungry!" he whined.

"So why didn't you just come get me?"

"You're scary."

Sighing, "Fine. I'll make you lunch. You want leeks?"

You should know how that song and dance goes.

"No leeks! No leeks! No leeks!" Kyo ran from Hatori shouting the two words over and over.

"I am never, having kids!" the doctor said. "Kyo! Get back here!" He chased after the boy through the hallway feeling foolish. He had better things to do than play hide and seek with a toddler.

!

It was almost an hour before Kyo realized he wasn't being followed. Curious by nature, Kyo started to wonder around the home. That wasn't his initial intention when coming there that morning.

The cat admired the paintings and structure of the home. Of course when walking by Hatori's office, he went on tip toes. Non-the less, Kyo's self-appointed tour went on.

That is until the smell of food intoxicated the youngster. He never did get to eat lunch.

!

The sun was beginning to set. Hatori could no longer deny that he had to attend to Kyo.

"Damn it all to hell." Hatori groaned getting up from his desk.

He exited the office room hearing what sounded like a conversation. Not just that, but singing. Very cheerful singing.

"I guess he turned the TV on." Just to be sure, Hatori headed for the living room.

The voice got more and more recognizable. Needless to say, Hatori wasn't surprised by who it was.

"The itsy-bitsy spider went up the water spout! Down came the rain and washed the spider out!" Kyo sang with a smile.

"Out came the sun and dried up all the rain! And the itsy-bitsy spider crawled up the spout again!" Shigure preached.

The dragon spoke up, "How many times have I told you not to barge into my house you stupid dog?"

Shrugging, "Well I couldn't just leave a starving kid unattended. You do know that they need food." Kyo giggled at the banter.

Frustrated, "So why did you eat what cousin Shigure gave you?"

"Cousin Shigure's nice and funny." Kyo said. Even though he meant it, Kyo tucked himself behind the zodiac dog. Granted Hatori's blank stare constantly in effect wasn't the best icebreaker.

"Fine." He faced Shigure, "Just look after him until Kazuma comes to pick him up."

"That's actually why I'm here." Shigure's tone changed greatly, "See that backpack in the corner? Well Kazuma is going to be staying a little longer and Kyo has to spend the night. Sooo."

Seeming to have a way out, "So take him to your house."

"No."

That one word of defiance took Hatori by surprise. Shigure never said 'no' to the dragon before.

"Excuse me?"

"You said you were going to watch him so you're going to watch him. If I take him to my house then you might as well come with me."

Hatori had many aspects. One of which was that he honored his word. Shigure knew this and played it to the letter.

"I don't know the first thing about kids!" he argued.

"You want him to sit still?" Shigure asked. Grabbing the TV remote, the novelist hit the power button.

The box clicked on revealing an animated show.

Music played, "Like no one ever was! To catch them is my real test! To train them is my cause!"

Like a hypnotic call, Kyo jolted over and sat down.

"Works every time!" Shigure boasted.

Baffled, "Is that all I had to do?"

"Oh no! Tomorrow, I'm going to teach you how to watch children."

"I think I did a decent job." Hatori said.

The lie was obvious. Especially for what Shigure went through.

"Do you see that band aid on our little kitten's neck?" Sure enough, there was a patch taking up the back of Kyo's hairline. "That's what happens when you don't interact with a child. They end up hurting themselves and not even knowing it. As a parent, you have to know it for them. A pain in the butt, yes. But they're your pain in the butt."

This went from a long day, to a long weekend.

Until Next Time


	2. Chapter 2

Cat-Sitting Pt. 2

Jet: The following is a non-profit fan-based parody. 'Fruits Basket is owned by 'Funimation', 'TV Tokyo', 'Tokyo Pop', and Natsuki Takaya. Please support the official release.

(Third Person)

Saturday morning, Hatori woke up to the sound of bedsprings. They were very close. Not even that. The noise was coming from the same bed he was in.

"Ayame, I swear to God!" Hatori twisted to the other end expecting a white haired snake. He was instead presented with an orange haired 6-year-old.

Kyo, his cousin was in the same bed as him. Curled up into a ball, the cat's chest rose and fell with his breath. The mop top was thrown around into a messy bundle.

Talking in his sleep, "I don't wanna take a bath." Normally, this would be found as cute to anyone else. The dragon however, was a different story.

!

"Shigure!" Hatori flew open the guest bedroom containing a youthful dog. "Why did I find this in my bed?"

Like most cat's, when their sleepy, they wake up when they want to. Hatori held the boy by the waistline of his cartoon character pajamas and Kyo was still out cold.

"How sweet!" Shigure said getting dressed. "Looks like he found his way to your bed."

"Don't give me that garbage. You put him in there!"

Kyo's eyes flickered, "What's going on?" Realizing he was suspended in the air, "AH! Put me down! Put me down! Put me down! You meanie! Let me go!" Two seconds of flailing his arms around was all it took to get Hatori to let him drop to the floor.

"Ow!" he whined landing flat on his butt.

Shigure scratched his chin, "I thought cat's always landed on their feet? Or something like that."

"Why'd you sneak into my bed?" Hatori asked sternly. A little too sternly.

Kyo's eyes went wide. Intimidated beyond reason, he hide behind Shigure as if he were a guard dog.

"Now now Kyo." Shigure patted his head, "It's okay. Cousin Hatori is just a bit of a jerk when he finds random people in his bed. Ask Ayame about it."

For the sake of keeping this rated T, let's move on.

!

Shigure's first lesson. Make sure the child has brushed their teeth.

"This is stupid." Hatori stated.

"Uh-Uh-Uh!" Shigure teased, "You never want to let the child know you don't encourage them doing the right thing."

"It's not the 'right thing'. It's common sense!"

Kyo grabbed his toothbrush, "Brush! Brush! Brush!" he cheered to himself painting the paste on the hairs of the stick.

"What was that?" the dragon asked.

"Kids tend to make things fun anyway they can. Try not to take it too seriously."

"That makes no sense."

"Well, you know what they say,"

"Say that line and I'll kill you."

Kyo came out of the bathroom to his watchers, "Finished!"

"Why do we,"

This time Shigure cut his friend off, "That was quick. Are you sure you gave every tooth your attention. They might get lonely."

Kyo gasped, "I didn't know that!" Running back to the sink, "Sorry teeth!"

Hatori stood there. Not doing anything, he just stood there. His mind couldn't contemplate what he just heard.

"You see," Shigure began.

"I don't wanna know."

Muffled from the brushing, Kyo sang, "Wall a mile 'ust ta e' me ile." Spit. "My shiny teeth and me!"

!

Now in the kitchen for breakfast, Shigure was going to show his next lesson.

"Alright Shigure." Hatori said. "What are we doing now?"

"The most important meal of the day of course!" he said. "You let him pour one thing while you do the other."

"Pour what?"

"Cereal."

"Do I look like a leprechaun to you?" Hatori's point was that he was to sophisticated, or felt that he was, to eat sugar, wheat, and color dye in fun shapes.

"Alright then. What do you eat for breakfast?"

"Pop-tarts."

This time, Shigure got to be confused, "And yet you're bashing cartoon characters on cardboard."

!

A little after Kyo finished his pastry, Shigure had let the boy watch TV. Now that his program was over, the man was curious.

"Say, Hatori." Shigure asked once entering Hatori's office, "What do you have planned for Kyo now?"

"Why would you think that I have anything planed?"

"It's Saturday! Take the poor boy to a park!"

Staring at his high school buddy, "I don't believe we've met. I'm earth. And you are?"

Playing to the insult/joke, "A person who thinks we should be nice to children."

Feed up with being ordered around, "Well then, you can take him! Why do you care about me taking care of some damn cat?"

"Well, that 'damn cat' is family. Why'd you agree to take him in for the weekend if you didn't like him?"

"You see how everyone else treats him. Kyo is like a plague to the other Sohmas. I felt sorry for the Goddamn brat. Nobody likes him. I didn't know why. Now I know that he has no redeeming qualities."

"How'd you diagnose that?" Shigure asked.

"Remember how you were able to handle him so easily? There is nothing special about him. He does everything a regular child does. He's not special. He's just a stupid cat."

A heart torn whimper came into the air. The two men realized that they left the door open for Kyo to be shunned.

"Oh no! Kyo! He didn't mean,"

The child cried, "**Leave me alone!**" Not knowing what else to do, Kyo sprinted out of the home.

Like a worried parent, Hatori chased after him.

!

Hatori had ran all around the neighborhood. At first he was half-assing the pursuit. Not truly searching for his lost cat.

Time pressed on. The sun started to fall lower and lower. Darkness was coming into play. Hatori was getting scared.

His calls only went into the ears of strangers. The name 'Kyo' was repeated over and over until Hatori's voice was sore. Even still, he kept yelling.

The fear of what Kazuma would do if his child went missing was in mind. But it was in the back in comparison to a much bigger fear. Is Kyo hurt?

'When will I find him?' 'Is he going to be mad at me?' 'Why did I say what I did?' 'Has anyone else found him and taken him to the police?' 'Has anyone else found him and…oh God!' 'Where is he!?'

!

It took almost four hours. Nonstop running. Nonstop yelling. Hatori had ran a marathon to see his goal. The orange kitten sitting under a tree with his knees tucked into his chest.

Not wanting to scare the child off, Hatori walked up to him. No words or major actions. He just casually approached him.

Kyo heard the footsteps but refused to look at his cruel cousin. His eyes fixated on the purple oriented red hazed horizon known as sunset.

"Kyo." Hatori said. "You know, you're a pretty good runner. And you've got a great sense of direction." The second one was exaggerated a bit. But the first was almost too obvious.

"I'm sorry for what I said. I was upset with Shigure and took it out on you. Will you forgive me?"

"Promise you won't call me stupid?"

Hatori let his hand out, "I promise."

Reluctantly, Kyo took Hatori's hand and followed him back.

!

Like a lonely dog, Shigure hugged Kyo on sight!

"Oh! My little kitten is back!"

"Cousin Shigure!" Kyo chuckled, "You're being weird again!"

"Come on in. I'll give you some candy."

Hatori tried not to make any comments on the possible joke.

!

That night, when Hatori felt his bed move, he woke up to see Kyo.

"What're you doing?" he asked.

"It's cold in my room." Kyo said. "Is it okay that I stay with you until Kazuma picks me up in the morning?"

Somewhat confused by the request, "Don't you think I'm scary?"

"Yeah. But Inspector Gadget is scary too, but he means well."

Not knowing who that was, Hatori brushed it off.

"Good night Kyo."

"G'night Cousin Hatori."

END


End file.
